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Not a bright spark
Posted by daveb on October 10th, 2007
Ever since it rained in Bern, Yoko has not been performing at all well. On good advice, we were to change the spark plugs and adjoining leads to cure the problem. Trouble is, the Swiss VW garages quoted us over a hundred pounds for these bits and bobs and we [politely] refused to pay so much, knowing full-well that we could get them shipped from the UK for a fraction of the price.
We ordered the bits from the UK six days ago and paid a little extra for express shipping with Parcel Force’s ‘Euro 48′ deal. It turns out that ’48’ is a bit of a misnomer. After five days of turning-up at Luzern’s post office with a hopeful face, only to be sent away empty-handed with a “come back tomorrow”, we’ve had to draw the line and move on. We’re now told that the parcel will “arrive tomorrow”. Tomorrow is a public holiday here and so we’re at least another two days from getting the parts, best case. As bad luck would have it, the campsite at Luzern is also the most expensive–by some 25 percent–that we’ve experienced in all of Switzerland. By now, it turns out that just paying the original inflated Swiss price for the parts would have worked-out cheaper than the import plus waiting costs that we’ve now incurred. :-(
We struggled on to Italy to try our luck there, although not before a fellow VW Camper, eh, camper decided to have a look at the state of one of our plugs to confirm what we already knew. Except he dropped the plug into the engine casing and Squiffy had to fish it out with a make-shift grabbing device (a fridge-magnet, duct-tape and an artist’s paintbrush) which also grabbed-out a bit of another make-shift grabbing device which presumably fell into the engine casing the last time somebody was fishing for a spark plug that they dropped too.
We crossed the border into Italy and found a Halfords-type store who sold us something close to the HT leads that we needed; I replaced them to no avail. The shop did not have the specific plugs that my Haynes manual listed, so the mechanic out the back found and fitted an equivalent and replaced the distributor cap. Finally, the machine now stays-up without stalling, although it has developed a new oil leak, which the mechanic* swears blind has nothing to do with his rampant over-revving of our good lady.
* Footnote: We just wanted you to know that our mechanic both looked and sang like Elvis. The King is alive.
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Gotthardpass: Auf weidersan Switzerland!
Posted by daveb on October 9th, 2007
Even with a faulty-spark, making for an even-more underpowered vehicle than usual, coupled with regular stalling, the Gotthardpass was still one heck of a drive. Hairpin after hairpin with ear-popping changes in altitude. I’m not convinced that Yoko enjoyed the drive as much as I did.
Believe it or not, many of these mountains were hollowed-out during the Second World War to give the Swiss folk a safe haven in which to take cover amongst the impassable mountains. Innocuous doorways mark the entrance to these vast underground networks. One human warren has been converted to an unmarked swanky hotel and we managed to find it, although not without knocking on the wrong door first. I spotted a ‘hidden’ door and pulled-over. I should have realised that perhaps this was not a hotel when pressing something resembling a doorbell set-off a military-style air-raid siren deep below our feet. Squiffy had a mini-panic and firmly requested that we returned to the car immediately. After peering into the behind-the-mesh-door darkness for a while, I gave up and turned to walk back towards the car. I noticed the binoculared-eyes of a man in a parked car a little down the road follow my every footstep. No doubt he is reading this blog. (If so: Sorry if I woke your platoon by accident…)
We identified the hotel a little bit further on and called them to see if we could get in for a drink. Unfortunately, as we hadn’t made a reservation we were politely turned-down. Shame.
Still, all a bit James Bond hey?
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Dear campsite owner
Posted by daveb on October 8th, 2007
Dear campsite owner,
We are travelling Europe in a small camper van and would like to have the following things at a campsite, even if only once in the three months that we’ll be camping:
General
- Located within a short walk to the town or local tourist sites. Nobody can walk 5 km in “a couple of minutes”.
- A spacious pitch in which it is possible to open a car door without it banging against the neighbouring ‘van.
- Wireless wifi- or fixed-line internet working, especially if you advertise yourselves as having it.
- Laundry facilities, if advertised, to be functional. More than one washer per hundred ‘vans.
- Full-time site residents not allowed to sneakily signal other residents to indicate the freeing-up of the sole washer, ensuring that holidaymakers don’t get a look-in.
- Fruit trees pruned such that my towel–often found drying on the back of my deck-chair–does not get splattered with the sticky innards of any falling fruit.
- A level pitch, across both axis, such that I don’t wake-up with a) a red hed, or b) red feet, and c) Squiffy’s nose pressed-up against my head pressed up against a side-cushion, or d) vice-versa.
Bathroom
- Modern, clean facilities prefered.
- Toilet paper provided in seated areas.
- Soap provided.
- Something with which we can dry our hands; perhaps a hot-air blower or paper towels. A rag would make do.
- Sink plugs, so that I don’t feel like I’m wasting [probably cold] water when shaving.
- Something to separate the ‘wet’ area in the shower from the dressing area, to avoid the latter (and all our clothes) getting soaked each time we make an attempt towards personal cleanliness.
- Constant running shower water — having to push a button every two seconds to stop the shower cutting-out is not acceptable.
- Use of shower included in the campsite price. We are not amused to have to pay for a shower which gives us only 180 seconds of cold water before cutting-out completely. The pressure of watching the digital countdown timer is too intense for us.
- Running hot water in shower, bathroom and washing-up sinks; if at all possible, for the shower to maintain a constant temperature. Minor temperature fluctuations are inevitable — instant step-changes between an “it’s so cold that I can hardly move my arms” icy blast to “ohmygod-argh-hot-ARGH” hugging-the-walls-of-the-cubicle-to-avoid-getting-scalded-by-the-liquid-fire and then back to icicle again within a quarter-inch turn of the control is frowned upon.
Please let us know whether you have the majority, or even all, of the above — we’d be over to you in a heartbeat.
Yours sincerely,
daveb & Squiffy.
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Photo of The Week – 5th October 2007
Posted by daveb on October 5th, 2007
Zermatt is a [petrol] car-free zone. Imagine our surprise at the low-speed pursuit between a milk-float and this electric police vehicle. There is no escape from the Police in Zermatt. Unless you can ride a bike. Or run.
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Luzern: The sixth most visited city
Posted by daveb on October 5th, 2007
The tourist office blurb proudly claims that Luzern (also writted ‘Lucerne’) is the sixth most visited city. No further qualification is given. I have no idea whether it’s the sixth most visited city in the region, the country, or the world. It seems a little bit strange to me to celebrate coming sixth in something; completed the race, not a podium finish, came somewhere in the middle — it’s the taking part that counts.
Looks-wise certainly ticks my boxes again: Big lake, mountain skyline, large enough to have a buzz and a bit of variety. It’s also full of foreign tourists–like us–which backs up its claims as a “visited city”. Lots of British and Japanese overheard, and a whole cakeload of American too.
It’s been touched by the hand of holidaymakers and, as such, it’s easy to get a Big Mac, a Starbucks, a bag of fine choccies and an expensive watch but it’s impossible to buy a camping gas heater to keep us warm on these cold nights.
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Three of Four
Posted by daveb on October 4th, 2007
I can’t believe it. In less than a month we’ve had to replace three out of the four tyres on our bus, Yoko. Earlier this week, we got the handbrake and speedometer fixed. Just after this, the ignition circuit went to poopoo in the rain (we’re expecting to receive the replacement parts tomorrow). Today, I saw fit to check the air in the tyres, given that now we’ve come down from altitude. Front-left–always the front-left–was massively overinflated.
“Huh?”
I deflated it to the correct pressure and we drove on. Not twenty mile had gone by and phut. Ploot. Phut. Ploot, ploot. Plung. Phut. Phuuuuuuut. Ploooooooooot. Phissss. Phiiiiiiiiiiiiis. Plut. Poot. Sing. Sing. Siiiing. Scring. Scccccring. Scccccccccccccccring. And we were driving on metal. It wasn’t as if our unfixed ignition system wasn’t giving me enough of a challenge–I cannot brake with my right foot as I have to keep the revs on with right to avoid cutting-out (you just try driving like that in a stop-start city)–but now I have three rubber tyres and one steel one. As absolute godsend luck would have it, I rolled to a stop outside a really friendly mechanics workshop no more than a hundred metres after putting my hazard warning lights on! Great bloke: Not only did he have an old, beaten-up tyre to Yoko’s specification kicking around his workshop, but he sold it and fitted it for a total of about £15 (contrast this with the £120 that we paid for two new tyres in France — and we’ve found Switzerland generally more expensive; good man!)
PS: To my Dad & Phil: I hope you’re proud of me — I’m getting my mechanics apprenticeship way faster than I expected. Not bad for a white-collar London IT worker!)
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Bern baby, Bern
Posted by Squiffy on October 3rd, 2007
Bern is the capital of Switzerland. It isn’t exactly a disco inferno but it does have a relaxed nightlife as Dave and I discovered. We arrived at our campsite in Bern late in the afternoon and, after a quick tea on our gas stove, walked along the river into the city centre. By then night was falling and the cobbled streets seemed pretty deserted. As we strolled along in the dark and the rain we began to notice jazz music and opera singing coming strangely from under our feet, whilst the prevailing ‘medieval’ smell reminded us both of the Yorvik Viking centre. This seemed like a cultural city with an interesting history. As we looked more closely, we realised the singing was coming from cellars below the street, many of which had been turned into trendy bars/music studios/unique shops/internet cafes. In need of a drink to keep us warm on a chilly evening we ventured into one of these underground bars, lit by candles and decorated with middle eastern furniture. It had a very cosy, intimate atmosphere and the barman was serving cocktails to the sound of smooth tunes on the radio. After a couple of beers, baileys and hot chocolates we ventured back out into the rain to continue exploring the pretty streets, and we saw many inviting and unusual cafes, bars and restaurants.
The next day we went back into Bern to see the city by daylight. For a capital city it isn’t very big but it has a really good feel to it which is hard to put into words. For a start, the architecture is interesting. The streets are lined on either side by archways, all of which contain independent shops or great looking eating places. Secondly, it just feels relaxed and trendy. The pictures don’t really capture it as many of the hip places are underground, but you’ll get the idea. Definitely one to visit again in the future.
It’s not all roses here though. It has rained pretty much solidly for the last 2 days and we are wet and cold. Last night we couldn’t find our tram home and stumbled around in the rain for ages, just wanting to be dry and in bed. However, Yoko develops a damp, cold atmosphere in the rain making it impossible for us to get warm. More worryingly, she is also now refusing to go anywhere. It seems her spark plugs/high tension leads don’t like the wet and so she is juddering along and stalling at junctions, which makes for fun driving. We went to a VW garage today to get new parts and they wanted £100 for what we know is £19 in the UK. As such, we are having them shipped over by express mail at a total cost of £35. (daveb: Although how on earth the postman is going to find us is anyone’s guess.) And we thought Britain was a rip-off!
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Interlaken: The ogre, the monk and the virgin
Posted by daveb on October 2nd, 2007
Have you heard the one about the ogre, the monk and the virgin?
I got a really good vibe as we neared Interlaken, just as I had before as we approached Lake Geneva (Lac Leman). All my view buttons were pushed: Water, mountains, greenery and people all within the same personal viewfinder. As usual, the non-driver (me, on this occasion) had to jump out at tourist information and find out about local campsites, etc.
Along my walk to the information bureau, I passed stall after stall offering tandem paragliding, heli-skydiving, white-water rafting, zorbing, etc. — you get the picture. There was a park opposite the tourist office in which the paragliders were making their careful landings after running off the mountains a couple of thousand feet above. For Interlaken is a lakeside tourist town sat at the base of the three massifs (or ‘big mountains’ for the uninitiated) in the Jungfrau region of Switzerland. It plays home to the three biggies of the Alps: The Eiger (ogre), the Monch (monk) and the Jungfrau (virgin). It hosts the highest train station in Europe.
In this space, I wish I could write about our amazing adventure sports experience. I wish I could write about how we stood on the highest train platform in Europe and then snow-trekked another hour to the mountain top hostel and stayed a night in thin air, surrounded by beautiful views. Here, I wish could tell you about our wild night in the Hooters bar in Interlaken (the first one I’ve seen on our travels thus far).
Instead, I must tell you the truth.
Right after we parked up at the TCS campsite in Interlaken (which has brand new, excellent facilities by the way) the heavens opened and it rained. Oh boy, did it rain. All play stopped. The paragliders ran for shelter. The dark clouds closed-in around the mountains, rendering the train-ride pointless. Even the waitresses in the Hooters bar put on bright orange fleecey zip-ups. (And, be honest, what’s the point going to a Hooters bar if the waitresses are wearing fleeces? The buffalo wings aren’t that good…)
We stayed just one night and drove on. I have vowed to return to Interlaken; of all the sights that we’ve seen so far, it’s the second place that I could earnestly see myself staying for a while [even if only to run off a mountain cliff under canopy thrice daily].
What a shame.
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Zermatt: The Matterhorn
Posted by daveb on October 1st, 2007
We only gave ourselves a day to conquer Zermatt, and the famous Matterhorn mountain, on which Toblerone chocolate is fabled to be shaped. In truth, there is quite a lot going on here that [with more money] one could spend a week here, even if not an all-year round skiier. The town itself is a car-free zone, so we stayed at the nearby village of Tasch, which struggles to present itself as more than just a car-park for Zermatt.
Zermatt itself is touristy and beautifully kept. We were beginning to get a little complacent with the continual bombardment of view-after-view that Switzerland provides and a busy tourist spot provided a bit of light relief for us. Of the two must-see experiences–the Gornergrat railway which winds through the mountains, promising exceptional panorama and the Matterhorn Glacier Paradise cable-car extravaganza–we chose the cable-car which would take us a distance of about 3,600 metres (11,808 feet) on three separate gondolas to the 3,883 metres (12,736 feet) summit of the Klein Matterhorn (‘Small Matterhorn’), the highest spot in Europe accessible in a skirt.
On the way up, we stopped-off to acclimatise with a cake at an ‘Animal Festival’ that the local mountain folk were throwing. The woolly sheep spent a lot of time looking overing their shoulders as they were not sure whether they were about to be celebrated or eaten. Once the last gondola had climbed its final near-vertical wall, a lift and a staircase provided us with easy access to the well-trodden, but still jaw-dropping summit of the Klein Matterhorn. We lucked-in with a few snaps of the Matterhorn and the neighbouring range before the winds picked up, the clouds closed-in and the temperature dropped further (it was -5 degrees celsius when we started our ascent). A disappointed coach load of Japanese tourists, clad in their customary golf-clubhouse smart attire and high-heels appeared and took some all-white pictures of cloud. One lady was so underdressed that I would swear she turned blue.
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Photo of The Week – 28th September 2007
Posted by daveb on September 28th, 2007
This was what was in the queue at the McDonald’s Drive-Thru in Brig, Switzerland:
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